Either you’re at the beginning of your relationship, or you’ve been dating for some time now and wondering where your relationship is going,
There is that one question that pops-up in your mind, or your relatives dare to ask it.
“Is this the one?”
But, how do you actually tell that? Can you even answer it to yourself, deep down inside, without saying out loud? Can you truly know?
Here are 13 subtle signs that probably you can sense and know what they mean, but refuse to take them into consideration. Because they mean that your partner isn’t the right one for you….
1. You make excuses for them
“He’s been burned before, so that’s why he has trust issues”, “she’s just going through a rough patch right now”… I know and it’s a good thing you’re trying to be optimistic, but face it – this is the beginning of the end and there’s nothing you can do about this. At least don’t embarrass yourself in front of the close people you’re obviously lying to when you tell them excuses like this.
2. Family drama
Either they don’t agree with your family, or you don’t agree with theirs. Or there’s the scenario when they don’t agree with their family, and that opens up serious doubts about the future of a relationship with a person who can’t outgrow and solve problems with their own blood, and what about your future problems as a family or a married couple?
3. You wonder if there’s someone better for you out there
If this idea comes on your mind, and you can’t chase it away – face your needs and what you lack from this relationship. Embrace yourself and achieve what you strive for. The sign here is that when you’re with the right person, all the other fish in the sea don’t seem as appealing as they did when you were single.
4. Your partner struggles with mental health issues
And even more, doesn’t want to get help, but says that you are all the support they need. They become such a burden over time and even more, you would feel enormous guilt if you try to leave them. You should be supportive, but not in the price of completely ruining your life.
5. You’re not aligned
Your goals and ideas for the near future are so different, they can never meet. This is a huge deal-breaker that shouldn’t be ignored. Because though there are things that a person could change, you should never change a person completely, or yourself for them. There are certain key characteristics that should be valued and cherished in a relationship.
6. They’re flaky
Canceling plans in the last minute, not picking up the phone, than calling with some lame excuse, being constantly late…. Leave this one! If you can make time for someone you care about and they don’t than I’m sorry to be the one to tell that you’re not that important as you think you are to them!
7. When you have good news to share, you just don’t share them
This is your gut talking, and the gut is correct in 99% of the cases. When you’re in a healthy and happy relationship, your first instinct is to tell them everything about your life and celebrate each other’s small milestones and successes.
8. You just can’t make yourself trust them
There are always some doubts on your mind, you want to check their phone and the stories about their whereabouts. Instead of living your life on the lookout, ask yourself – why you can’t trust them? And ask them before doing anything stupid. Don’t be a snitch, be more direct.
9. They don’t invest in you
Sure we all have distractions, such as other people, work, family, time for ourselves…but for someone you want to spend the rest of your with, the first thing you give them is your time. Because there’s no gift that could substitute the time you missed being together.
10. You feel bad about yourself
And they make you feel like this! This is a vicious cycle and it’s mostly with people who don’t feel good about themselves, so you feel ashamed to be better. Not making yourself a better person and not growing up is a huge sign that you don’t belong together, because you’ll just end up bitter and unhappy in a very short time.
11. They aren’t committed
There is a really nice saying I red in a love novel and it says “People commit because they want a future with you, and the thought of losing you is scary. If they aren’t committing, then it could be because they aren’t afraid of losing you”.
12. They bring out the worse in you
Though a successful relationship demands time, effort and patience, if you take a time to look at yourself and can’t even recognize yourself anymore, feel embarrassed and ashamed of what you’ve become, arguing all the time and being a petty freak over small things – obviously your partner isn’t right for you. Though you might still love them and though they might not be a bad person, they’re a bad choice for you!
Your gut tells you
And as we’ve said, the gut is right in 99% of the cases. It’s one of the last and ultimate signs of a bad relationship and bad influence. Always trust you intuition. In the end, we use only 5%of the thinking capacity with our waking logic….but our gut is something that comes “from the other side”…